50 Questions - #46-50

46. What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you? The thing is - I don't really care who judges me - I do what I do. I like what I do.

47. When was the last time you noticed the sound of your own breathing? Whenever I am sick - I hate it!

48. What do you love? Have any of your recent actions openly expressed this love? I only express that I love things often - except for the relationship I am in...it is silly, but I can't help it. I want to say it but I guess in time it will come.

49. In 5 years from now, will you remember what you did yesterday? What about the day before that? Or the day before that? What i did yesterday- I will remember seeing baby D always for the first time. He is so sweet. Newborns are amazing. I will probably not remember the hand holds and the cuddles from B exactly- but I hope in 5 years I know how they still feel.

50. Decisions are being made right now. The question is: Are you making them for yourself, or are you letting others make them for you? I am trying to be more independent and make them for myself.

50 questions - # 26-45

26. Would you rather lose all of your old memories, or never be able to make new ones?
This is incredibly difficult. I have lived such an amazing life. I have done, seen and explored more than most. I wouldn't ever want to lose the memories of my loved ones that have passed away but the idea of never making new ones saddens me. I believe in living in the present - and sometimes straying into the past- so I will have to say I would rather lose old memories so that I can live in the present. THIS was the most difficult question so far!

27. Is is possible to know the truth without challenging it first? Nope.

28. Has your greatest fear ever come true? It was my greatest fear- then it happened and now I have a different one.

29. Do you remember that time 5 years ago when you were extremely upset? Does it really matter now? No I don't and no it doesn't.

30. What is your happiest childhood memory? What makes it so special? Happiest- jumping on the trampoline with the water hose with my brother. It was fun. We laughed like crazy. My parents watched us from the kitchen window. IT reminds me how my life has been. Fun times with my brother and I laughing and our parents so happy to see us so happy.

31. At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive? Reconnecting with B. Hands down it has been the most amazing time. I don't want it to ever end. I laugh and smile every single day. I am so lucky to have him in my life.

32. If not now, then when? If not now, then never. That's what I think. ;) Patience is not a virtue of mine!

33. If you haven’t achieved it yet, what do you have to lose? If I haven't acheieved it I am not done trying!

34. Have you ever been with someone, said nothing, and walked away feeling like you just had the best conversation ever? Yes. And it was the best conversation ever.

35. Why do religions that support love cause so many wars? If we only knew! You have too many people that have such strong convictions that they fight for those convictions and lose sight of what the convictions actually stood for - usually they stand for love and peace. It is sad really.

36. Is it possible to know, without a doubt, what is good and what is evil? In everything- I don't think so. In some things I think it is possible to know.

37. If you just won a million dollars, would you quit your job? One million? No. $20 million. yes.

38. Would you rather have less work to do, or more work you actually enjoy doing? More work I enjoy. IF you enjoy it - it isn't work.

39. Do you feel like you’ve lived this day a hundred times before? This day? Nope. It is new. It is wonderful.

40. When was the last time you marched into the dark with only the soft glow of an idea you strongly believed in? huh? No idea about this one.

41. If you knew that everyone you know was going to die tomorrow, who would you visit today? My family. The idea of not seeing my parents or my brother after tomorrow is unthinkable to me. They are my rock. I would love to see my godparents, friends etc - but quality time with my parents and my brother would be essential in my moving forward in my life.

42. Would you be willing to reduce your life expectancy by 10 years to become extremely attractive or famous? No. I love my life. While I would love to be skinnier - I would rather be alive.

43. What is the difference between being alive and truly living? Alive is merely existing. Truly living is - laughing, playing, enjoying time with others, enjoying alone time, seeing sights and FEELING emotions. I would never want to just be alive.

44. When is it time to stop calculating risk and rewards, and just go ahead and do what you know is right? Ha. If only I didn't calculate all of the time!!!

45. If we learn from our mistakes, why are we always so afraid to make a mistake? We would rather not make them - you can learn from OTHERS! ;)

50 questions - #16- 25

16. How come the things that make you happy don’t make everyone happy? Everyone has different tastes in life. I would be boring if we all liked the same things!


17. What one thing have you not done that you really want to do?
If I were to answer this a year ago - the answer would be fall in love - unconditional love. But I'm there. So now- I would love to one day get married. I believe in marriage and I believe in everlasting love - it will come - when it is supposed to come and I have no intention of hurrying it along - I am happy and very content in where I am. IF we are talking about something silly - I would say I really really want to go backpacking again for two weeks, somewhere.

18. Are you holding onto something you need to let go of? Ha ha. Yes. But I am in the process of letting go. It is an old friendship that brings a lot of pain into my life- I know it is time to say goodbye.

19. If you had to move to a state or country besides the one you currently live in, where would you move and why?
Italy- I love the country, the food (they are VERY gluten free friendly!), the people and overall I love it there. I can't wait to return one day!

20. Do you push the elevator button more than once? Do you really believe it makes the elevator faster? No and no.

21. Would you rather be a worried genius or a joyful simpleton? Worried genius. I value intelligence.

22. Why are you, you? I believe circumstance, nature and nurture makes everyone who they are. It isn't all genetics, but some it is and it isn't all just environment - I think when you go through something painful (or joyful) it changes you. Life is all about change.

23. Have you been the kind of friend you want as a friend? I think I am better with some than others. Everyone has let a friendship go now and then. Overall - I think I am a great friend. I do surround myself with amazing people and I do value their friendships.

24. Which is worse, when a good friend moves away, or losing touch with a good friend who lives right near you? When they are right near you and you lose touch. It is sad, but sometimes best.

25. What are you most grateful for? My family. Family isn't just the people who are blood related - I call my friends my family as well. I have the best parents I could ever have asked for. I've always felt loved and cared for. My brother is one of my best friends and while we don't always get along my life is infinitely better because of him.

50 Questions - #15

What’s something you know you do differently than most people?

The way I express my feelings. Towards most people - I am happy go lucky all of the time. I smile all of the time. Towards my closest people in my life is when I allow myself to cry, be sad, etc. While I am not sad, upset etc for long - I just don't show that side - my "vulnerable" side to everyone, and I am ok with that.

50 Questions - #14

Have you ever seen insanity where you later saw creativity?

I see that in art all of the time. In life I think most things that I think are insane - are.

50 Questions - #13

Would you break the law to save a loved one?
Absolutely.

50 Questions - #12

If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be?

Love. (life, animals, people, your surroundings, your job, your lover). Love your life and EVERYTHING you have been blessed with. Never lose sight of the little things.

50 questions - #11

You’re having lunch with three people you respect and admire. They all start criticizing a close friend of yours, not knowing she is your friend. The criticism is distasteful and unjustified. What do you do?

Say something. IF it continues just state that I have to leave the conversation as I don't want to partake it in.

50 questions - #10

Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things?

Doing the right thing. I am a very particular person but in the end, I always want to do what is the right thing.

50 questions - #9

To what degree have you actually controlled the course your life has taken?

I would say that I have worked hard for the things, experiences etc that I wanted. I don't believe I am "in control" of my life - but I am in control of my actions towards others and towards myself. I try to do the right thing and I think doing the right thing does help in life. I believe in do unto others as you would like done unto you. So that's how I live my life.

50 questions - #8

If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently?
At this very moment? I wouldn't change anything. In the past I still wouldn't have changed anything. I absolutely love my life. I am doing more, loving more, and living more than I ever have.

50 questions - #7

Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing?

I am trying to get to a place to do what I believe in. I think this is a work in progress- always.

50 Question - #6

If happiness was the national currency, what kind of work would make you rich?

Something that involves helping people. I loved working with MADD when I was younger (no I am not a mom, just a huge advocate for not drinking and driving) - one of my best friends was killed by a drunk driver. I would love to work for MADD again- but it is heartbreaking.

I wouldn't mind working at the zoo, an animal shelter etc - but all of those jobs require a little bit of heartbreak.

So maybe....a cook? I like cooking - I would love to REALLY learn how to cook - like take a real course on cooking.

50 questions - #5

What is the one thing you’d most like to change about the world?
Intolerance. Racism. I see it everywhere. It annoys me. Some people say "reverse" racism - which I think is RIDICULOUS...as racism is racism. You can't have REVERSE racism.

I guess I would also say violence. All kinds.

I cheated - that is 3.

50 questions - #4

When it’s all said and done, will you have said more than you’ve done?

I talk a lot. I like to do a lot of things. I am sure that it will be about 50/50.

50 Questions - #3

If life is so short, why do we do so many things we don’t like and like so many things we don’t do?
I find myself wondering something similar all of the time. So I did something about it. Sure no one wants to do dishes, clean up clothes, do laundry etc - so I think you find balance. You do somethings that you should do and some things that you WANT to do. Life is all about the balance.

50 questions - #2

Which is worse, failing or never trying?

Never trying. Without a doubt never trying.

50 questions - #1

How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are?

Somedays I feel so much older than I am right now. I am 27. That is not OLD nor is it YOUNG...I am almost 30, approximately 1/3 into my life. There are days when I think I am 18 again and days when I wonder HOW can I act so old! Overall though- I think I am like most single/unmarried 27 year olds. I think I (finally) act my age. If I would have answered this 5 years ago - I would say I acted 30. But now- I am slowly finding the balance being old and being young. I feel that I am at a great place in life.

50 questions that will free your mind?

Has anyone ever heard of this?
After reading the questions - I really want to do this...so forgive me if I am boring for a while, but I am going to answer them, slowly but I want to get through all of them.