Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Memories and hopes

I for the first time in a long time have "writers/bloggers block"

I started this blog as a way for me to look back on my life and see how I have changed. I've always had a diary/journal and when I left for college I started a blog. This is probably my 5th blog and so far it has proven to be helpful to show me how much I have grown.

I love to look back on my life and "remember" and I love to look forward and "hope".

I remember the following:
  •  I felt when I started law school - I was excited and knew this was what I wanted to do with my life, I was in a new state and loving life.
  • The way I felt when I decided I no longer wanted to be an attorney - it took a lot of soul searching that summer and I realized that I was so incredibly unhappy- and yet I loved Chicago- all of it!
  • The way I felt when I was "alone" again (it was difficult and yet a blessing more of a blessing than I could ever have hoped for)  
  •  Starting a business with my Dad and becoming closer to my family. I am so incredibly blessed to have the family I have - and sometimes when I meet people that aren't as fortunate to come from such a loving family I wonder "how do they do it?" because my family gives me strength when I don't have, love when I am not feeling it and happiness always.
 All of those happened within 1.5 years.  It was a rough, tough 1.5 years. I would say the toughest in my entire life. I am glad it is behind me because I have such a bright amazing future. I love my life.

Truly one day I said to myself "I have one life so I might as well love it and be happy every single day - so I am."  It is amazing what that statement did to my life.

I am hopeful for the following:
  • To find another career path - while working with my father has been amazing and wonderful and everything that I could have ever wanted, it is time to move forward in my career.
  • To find an amazing apartment within the loop and near where I want to be - I have an area in the city that I have always wanted to live in, and now seems like the perfect time to be doing that
  • To stay happily in love with B - There aren't any problems or anything that is making me think this won't happen, I just want this to stay how it is. I have never had a relationship with zero "issues", nor a relationship without major drama/fighting. I truly have a sincere smile on my face and my heart when I think of us. I am truly grateful for this love.

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