Crazy fun life

The past few weeks have been crazy, but fun.

B and I went back to Austin 2 weekends ago. We went to the UT game and truly had a wonderful time being in the city where we first met. UT won, which made it all the better! We stayed with the best man in our wedding and his wife (and their 4 month old - who is so precious!!!) All in all - It was wonderful.

This year is flying by so quickly and there is so much happening in our lives.

We already have our next two trips planned out. Both are family trips. One with his parents and one with my family.

With his parents we are taking their boat from Delray Beach, Florida to Duck Key. We are staying in the Marina (on their boart) at Hawks Cay Resort.  I am looking foward to it. I love my in laws. They are truly such amazing people and I love that we all get along. I feel truly fortunate to have in laws that are so wonderful. I know quite a few people who are not as fortunate as I am. Hearing the horror stories makes me know how blessed I am. A week in the Florida keys sounds fabulous to me!

The other trip that is now finally planned is our trip to Cuba. This trip with my family is something that I have wanted to do ever since I was little. The last time my mom was in Cuba, she was 8 years old. This is a "homecoming" of sorts, and yet I know it will be incredibly hard on my grandfather. I think there will be ups and downs - but truly I want to see where my mom's family comes from - and I want to see it through his eyes.

There are so many things to look foward to - Thanksgiving, CHristmas, Parties, luncheons, dinners and everything in between.

This truly is the best time of the year!

4 Amazing incredible years

Today marks 4 years of B and I being together.

I know our anniversary has changed now that we are married. October 29 is no longer the date to "celebrate" as May 11 has taken that spot. But 4 years is incredible to me.

Incredible for so many things - because 4 years ago - I was not a wife, I was just becoming a girlfriend. I was in many ways finding myself and figuring out life - afterall this is what my entire blog is about right?

Figuring out this long road called life - trying to live and love life one day at a time.

I named my blog that so many years ago (February of 2008- wow I have been blogging on this blog for over 5 years...where did the time go?!)

The thing is - I still don't know about this life - I am STILL trying to live and love life one day at a time - but now - I am not doing it alone. I haven't done this alone in 4 years. B and I are figuring out this long road called life - TOGETHER and we are living and loving life one day at at time TOGETHER.

4 years is a big one for the two of us - we now are in our longest relationships ever. Both of us came with baggage- both of us had "previous lives" and previous relationships that lasted over 3 years...but never 4.

So here we are - jumping into something new - and yet - we already made the leap we are husband and wife - and all of this is new - and yet- he and I - we aren't new - we are just us on this journey together.

This journey that has been the largest blessing in my life (and his I am sure) than I ever thought possible. I cannot believe how much life can change in 4 years.


B- Thank you for the last 4 years. You are my heart, my love and truly the greatest person I've ever known. I am in awe of our life together - I am so blessed to be on this journey in life with you.


2013 has been the best year of my life so far - but I know it is just getting started.

3 amazing incredible years

Tpyically I post a pinterest post on Monday...but not this Monday.

This Monday is different. 3 years ago today, B and I started dating..for real this time. In the past we had gone on a few dates here and there, but we never actually had a relationship. We were friends.

Everything changed on October 29, 2009. We had been hanging out, going on a few dates and just genuinely enjoying each others company - little did we know we were starting a relationship.

We traveled, went to weddings, hung out with friends, partied, got to know each of other's families:

This time we were both in it, for real. 2 and half years later, on April 5, 2012  this happened:

And now, on October 29, 2012 - 3 years from the date we started dating - I cannot believe we are getting married in a few months.

I don't normally do this, but here goes:

B,

From the moment we became friends in college, I knew you were different. I did NOT know you would one day become my fiance and my soon to be husband. I knew you were kind, generous, always down for some fun, and that you smiled constantly. I knew you were passionate about life, cars and having a cold beer. I did not know you were also passionate about me. I knew you were a wonderful friend and I knew we could talk for hours - our bank statements probably agree since we drank so much starbucks in college together. I did not know we would be sharing those long talks and endless starbucks together years later. I knew we were friends, I never thought we would one day be husband and wife.

 

I cannot tell you how amazing it is to see us grow - grow up, become adults, see each other through rough times and great times - but mostly to have you by my side. I am lucky, I am blessed.

Thank you for the countless times we met at the starbucks on Far West, the many rides home in college after a great night at Cain and Abels, fun poker nights, going to the shooting range, long talks about love and life, telling me I shouldn't do something (only to still do it and you be right!),  all of the adventure, the camping, the trips, making me try things out of my comfort zone but mostly...

 thank you for taking the bold move of getting in contact with me after a few years had gone by with no communication between us. Without that - we wouldn't have built this amazing life together. 

I never thought in a million years that long ago from our very first date back in 2003, to becoming friends for years, to losing touch and meeting up again in 2009 that we would be here in our life together.  I cannot wait for us to be married.

I love you with all of my heart,

A



Good company

B was out of town for the past 8 days and to say I missed him would be an understatement. I think since I take care of Roxy when he's gone it makes me miss him more - she is so sweet and loving!

So he got home yesterday and went to see his his dad's great aunt and one of her kids...what would that make them to him? (great great aunt and 3rd cousin?...not quite sure!)

ANYWAY....

After they went to dinner I met up with B and his dad at our wine bar. It was great to see his dad and catch up and it was wonderful to see B again. We shared wine and cheese and chatted up with his dad. His dad left halfway through and then B and I caught up.

I didn't realize how touch is such a powerful love language. I missed his hugs, kisses and I missed how he always seems to hold my hand, put his arm around me etc. It was lovely. Impromtu date nights always are lovely.

Cinco de Mayo fun

While this blog is mostly for fun and for my 101 in 1001 list - I slowly see that it has also become a way for me to remember my life. It is fun to look back and see and remember good times (and bad!).

Cinco de Mayo was so much fun last night - mostly because of B. (of course)

The day started off kinda scary actually! I was at his place because I had 2 meetings by his house yesterday. So as I was blow drying my hair Roxy started barking...so I turned off the blowdryer and told her to hush. Then I heard the front gate slam closed. I thought to myself "thats weird" but figured someone was leaving a flyer at the door or something. Then I started blowdrying my hair again. Rox then went crazy. So I turned off the blowdryer and heard the next door neighbors house alarm going off. Then I heard someone yell "oh shit" and THEN the scary part- they went running on the roof of B's place to escape! So I have a very overactive imagination- so I called B and he told me to call the cops (why I called him first I don't know) but anyway it took the cops 34 minutes to arrive...I'm glad no one got in!

Needless to say it was a crazy morning.

I met B and one of his co-workers for lunch and I was still shaking...my hair didn't get done and I went makeupless...thank god I have good skin! ;)

Then I went to my meeting and met B back up at his place after work. He hugged me and we chatted and we watched the rest of the Lovely Bones (scary but great book!) It was fun. I wasn't feeling particularly in the mood to put makeup on and get all fancied up so I said "does my face need any make up?" and he said "your face is always beautiful" or something like that...you have to know that B isn't really a word kinda person so I think whenever I hear him say things like that it makes my heart melt. Yes...it is that easy to make my day.

Then we met up with friends for Mexican food and too many margaritas.

B and I got there early so we enjoyed a margarita on the patio and just chatted (about lovely things like the new law in Arizona...always a great drinking topic ha!) and truly I just feel so fabulous when we are together. We drank and ate dinner with his friends (I mean I guess they are my friends too but they were his friends first) ;) Overall a fantastic night...

I so wish he wasn't out of town now...I'll start missing him in a few days! ;)

Some call it...

So my blog is sometimes fun and light hearted, sometimes not...but mostly it is just the stuff that is going on in my life and in my head. As most can see I am in a semi-new relationship with one of the most amazing people I've ever known. And yes...before we were dating I thought that about him. So here I am. My life is amazing and I am lucky...blessed...whatever the word may be. But I am so hesitant in the relationship - I've been hurt, lied to, etc before. So I go two steps forward then 1 step back with this relationship.

I don't want to hurt the friendship with the relationship and yet I dont want to hurt the relationship because of the friendship. So...it is a slippery slope but at the same time...it is wonderful. It is 100% wonderful.

So how does one know it is love and not lust?

We've all been there. You are dating then it is exclusive then almost 6 months go by and then is it love or lust or a combination?

I'm at that point. I am at the point where I think I am in love. It has been 6 years since I was in love. 6 years since being with someone that I truly trusted, cared about, wanted nothing but the best for and no matter what happened - his happiness was super important to me.

And in between those 6 years I was in a long term relationship with 2 different people and dated countless amounts of people. In those 6 years I said "I love you" to two different people and the thing is - at the time I meant it. I did love them but I wasn't in love with them. I just wasn't. I wanted it to work - but the thing is...it didn't.

6 years since I saw a life that I truly wanted to have with someone. I have no idea what is intended to happen and the thing is - for the first time ever- I am 100% ok with not knowing. I don't have to read the ending before reading the book. I don't have to question everything...I just have the faith in knowing whatever will happen will happen. There are no red flags, no lies, no daunting questions that I am worried about.

I think...I am in love.

B's Birthday!

Nothing too fancy - he came home and we chatted and caught up with each other (we haven't spent a lot of time together lately!) Then he opened his presents - he knew one of them but the other two I think he was surprised at and then...DINNER



WE went to Max's wine dive - loved the wine, the atmosphere was ok and the food was good...but the company was fantastic.



What can I say....I just truly enjoy every moment we spend together.



After dinner we came home, cuddled on the couch while watching TV and then went to bed. We awoke this morning and rushed to get ready and head to work...truly enjoy every second I'm with him. :)

Date night!

Last night B and I had a date night. I loved it. Sometimes I think life goes by quickly and it is nice to stop and smell the roses so to speak. I truly enjoy our date nights for lots of reasons.

• I am with someone who stops and takes the time to be in the moment with me. I have never had that before. I, of course, wanted to talk about how long we've been together, past great dates etc and he of course told me to stop thinking about the past or the future and to live in the now. It is so hard for me to do that. It is hard for me to not compare or evaluate things on an on going basis. I wonder if he ever evaluates us or thinks about the past or the future. I know men and women think differently, but sometimes I have no idea what is going through his mind.


• I always feel so important when I am with him. I know this should be an obvious thing but when I look back and think about him and I, I never have a doubt in my mind that I am important to him. It is a wonderful feeling.


• I enjoy his company. We laugh, poke fun, (sometimes I am too sensitive and I do like that he doesn't let me be overly sensitive!) and inbetween those moments there are stolen kisses, hugs and hands held.


• We may not be the overly affectionate couple - but date night includes my favorite things - him opening the door (I know it is cliche, but I love it when he opens the car door for me), holding hands as we drive (this always makes me feel so special!), kisses and good wine with lots of laughter. I don't think we have ever had a date night without wine. It's kinda our thing!

Anyway- last night we went to Ruggles Grill and it was so good. We split a crab cake (divine!) and I had the salmon and he had the stuffed chicken. After Ruggles we went to the Tasting Room (per our usual!) and split a bottle of Malbec. All in all, a wonderful date night.

As he heads out of town for a bachelor party - this weekend is going to be quite the girls weekend - drinks, mani/pedi, drinks and brunch. Cannot wait...and hopefully I will bake an apple pie on Sunday :)

2 ER visits and one amazing boyfriend

St Patty's day 2010 will not be forgotten by me in a long long time....

I was at work and started to feel a little itchy. I took 2 benadryl and left work at 3 to head down to the festivities with B and one of his co-workers. I break out into hives every once in a while and I thought, oh well, I just won't drink and I'll be fine. We hung out until 7 and then B had to go to a company dinner so I headed to his place- I got dinner and settled in to watch TV. Around 9 I started to feel awful and I had hives that wouldn't go away and I started to not be able to breathe 100%. So I texted B that I thought that I needed to go to the ER. He came home and rushed me to the ER where we were for 4 hours. He took such great care of me.
I took Thursday off of work and stayed at his place. B called throughout the day and made sure I was doing ok. We went out for dinner (because I couldn't handle just sitting inside any longer!) and then headed back to his place. I fell asleep on the couch and woke up right as he was going to bed...my face, lips and body were all swollen - so we went back to the ER. We were there until 5 am and he had a flight to catch to Mexico for work at 830. Poor guy got an hours worth of sleep. He called non stop from Mexico to make sure I was ok. I spent Friday night with my friend V and then headed to my parents on Saturday (they were out of town until Saturday night).

Truly...I have never in my life ever had an allergic reaction like that. I am so lucky to have such a caring, compassionate and loving bf. I am sure he thinks I am "overreacting" by how thankful I am...but I am really thankful that he didn't think it was nothing and that he took such great care of me.

feelings and honesty

So I think B and I are ok. So we had a few bumps and for now we are smooth sailing. I don't know what my future has for me. I know that I care about him and would like for this happiness that he brings to my life to continue but he by no means is the only reason I am so happy.


I was talking to my best friend last night and being brutally honest about my feelings. I tend to be sensitive but not let a lot of people see my true feelings. A really good friend once told me that I smile through all pain- and the thing is...I do. Sometimes I only let myself feel when I am all alone.
At 27 years old I thought my life would be different. Not better or worse, just different. I was always the girl in a long term relationship. I was happy, fun loving, and truly just going through life with a smile on my face. I thought by 27 I would have found the one. I would be settled (at least in the love department) and have my partner to go through life with.
Careerwise I had no idea where I would be. I am sure I didn't think I would be happy and so fulfilled. Most of my friends are either married or engaged and that is a little difficult for me. I know it will happen one day. I am really happy with my life the way it is and when the right person comes along I will be more than happy to let them in my life. I am more than happy for my friends. My friends husband's have been so amazing to me, especially my best friend K's husband. J has known me for the better part of 7 years. He has always said that I don't date quality people. He has sometimes really hurt my feelings but I know it is because he cares and truly wants me to be happy. Between K and J I couldn't have better friends.
Anyway- as K and I were talking she said something that really helped. She said - "all of us struggle with those issues. While I am not struggling with being single I am struggling with the idea that maybe I grew up to fast and settled down too early and stopped going out so much. While I love J and I know he is my match for life, sometimes I think I missed out on the "single" life. Everyone just has to have the balance in their life to know they are doing the best they can. "

It helped me more than she realized.

too quick to say

Maybe I said it too quickly because we are talking. I think I realized that we never talk about things that bother us...and we are both so giving that I think we sometimes forget about ourselves. So for now I wouldn't say it is over...I would say we are trying to see what the future brings...in my own heart - I hope it is love and happiness...in whatever form. I would hate for our friendship to be ruined. I feel so blessed that he is back in my life after so long that I would hope there is more in store.

some things change so quickly

So...we are no longer together. He needs time to figure things out and needs alone time...so I have no idea what to say.

Love and Valentines Day

Falling in love. I feel that I am falling in love right now.
I've been in love one time in my life. I was 18 and it was a beautiful friendship, love and more. We grew together, cared so much about one another and truly I was heartbroken when I knew it wasn't forever. I've only ever been heartbroken once as well. Falling in love and being heartbroken all with one person. At 27 one would think this has happened more to me, but I am cautious who I have given my heart to. I've loved many but I've only ever been in love once. To this day I still believe he is one of the most amazing and wonderful men I have ever known. I am so blessed that we are friends. I think to be in love it takes time, patience, and truly learning about the other person. Knowing just by voice inflections how their day was, what is going on and truly knowing the other person so well that you can "read them the words to their life when they have forgotten them". Still, whenever I talk to him, I know him. I like that. People change- their likes, dislikes etc...but the true core of someone stays the same.
I feel that so many people "fall in love" all of the time and truly it is more of a lust than a love. These days people say "I love you" so carelessly. I believe one loves someone way before they ever are in love with them. I forgot this feeling. I forgot how I was at 18 when I was falling in love. It is an amazing feeling. Everything clicks and all is right in the world. I know I am nowhere near "in love" but the falling in love is wonderful. Every moment we spend together I feel so blessed and so excited. My heart is so full. It brings me back to remembering those feelings. The only other time I've been this way and the only other time there weren't "red flags" everywhere.
Of course this comes after Valentine's Day- the day of love- the Hallmark Holiday...
This Valentines Day he sent me a beautiful rose bush that is blooming on my desk as we speak, we went out to dinner, then to "our" wine bar and then home. We went hiking, took the car offroading, went to the beach, watched the sunset, made brunch together, got coffee together, had dinner with my family, played with the pup, watched the Olympics and spent almost 3 days together nonstop. 3 blissful days of laughter, hugs and kisses. I am so blessed.

Date night

So I've dated lots of people, I've been in several long term relationships and I have NEVER dated ONE person that liked the idea of "date night"...until now.

I know I have mentioned how much I like B, how wonderful he is and overall how incredibly lucky I am to have him in my life. I am so happy that we never got into a relationship in college. I am glad we both at one time or another just weren't ready for the other. I am so incredibly blessed to have him in my life. I literally wake up every morning thinking how lucky I am.

Last night was date night. We went out for sushi. (We now know not to go to Uptown Sushi ever again. While delish- highly overpriced and Aka is WAY better!) We sat in one of those "swanky" booths and it was like being in our own world. Miso soup, edamame, tuna tartare, 3 rolls and a few pieces of salmon - I was stuffed. I was happy and I was enjoying every second of it being just hima nd I.
After sushi we went to Tasting Room for amazing wine. One bottle of Malbec to split please! We sat on the patio, next to a heater and truly enjoyed each other's company. We held hands, chatted, cuddled and kissed. Super romantic and overall- exactly how we always are together.

I do enjoy wine and I do love sushi and I think it is wonderful to be dating someone that enjoys both of them as well.

I have never had a bad time when I am with him. I am the luckiest gal alive. He is amazing. He is wonderful, thoughtful and just overall the best match for me that I have ever had.